Bi-Weekly Newsletter
Üdvözlünk, üdvözlünk, üdvözlünk a 4. számú hírlevélben. We hope, from all the team at STR, that you have had a merry and restful Christmas full of peace and joy.
We didn’t if you were asking.
The reindeers have hung up their driving goggles for this festive season after nearly 3 weeks on the pull. Good job lads, we’ll see you again next year! The regular STR staff shall resume their positions after much industrial action, physical resistance and questions on the fabric of the train line’s existence, after absolutely no progress being made on its infrastructure since its inception.
The long awaited Boxing Day Match was a triumph for Hairyart Lea FC, beating Burnlea a whopping 3-0. The game was full of excitement from a generational half way line goal from goalkeeper, Seaman, to a 88’ substitution leading to the final goal due to one of Savage’s pin curls coming loose. Due to the popularity of this years game, we are pleased to announce that Hairyart Lea FC and Burnlea FC will take on one another again next year, this time at the wondorously whimsical, Turf Moor.
Selling fast! Buy your supplies using the links below in preparation for your trip to Lancashire’s football capital.
Kevlar Vest – Safeguard Clothing
3kg Strawberry Conserve – Nisbets
Due to our continued support from our slimey sponsor, Shell oil and our strictly local Bank of Save strictly for local people, a media team has been created to continue the promotion of STR. Our beloved football manager and demigod, Sir Harriet Lea, is appointed as executive producer for the media division of STR. The team has already been hard at work, with their debut television programme set to hit our screens in around the next year or two or so.
Planned engineering works = between now and the next solar eclipse there will be disruptions on all lines passing through Bank with no trains going through any of the stations on the line.*
*STR map is still under construction.
**Engineering works are subject to time extensions due to slow processing and dyslexia.
We sincerely apologise for the reindeer replacement bus that had to operate on Boxing Day and the disruption it may have caused to your journey. Delay repay scheme found here www.donrkbabfoundation.com .
R.I.P. STR Christmas temp, Payroll No. 2573, Mr. Don R. K. Bab, 28.03.21 – 26.12.25.